Parenting by Design - June 9

Confronting rebellion

Numbers 14:18:  "The Lord is slow to anger, abounding in love and forgiving sin and rebellion.  Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished…" (NIV).

What prevents you from calmly following through with consequences when your kids sin or rebel?  I resisted giving consequences because I wanted to avoid angry responses such as: "Chill, mom!"  "You're mean." Or, "I'll do it later."  Instead, I tried reasoning with them, but this usually backfired.  I tried arguing my point, but the more I talked, the angrier they seemed to become.  I was hiding behind words (nagging, reminding and arguing) to avoid giving consequences.

When you receive an angry response, don't escalate the situation by nagging or replying in anger.  Words are easy.  You may think you are being "strong" when you argue your point forcefully or make dictatorial decrees, but the truth is it takes more strength to restrain your tongue and give consequences calmly and with empathy.  That is a model of real strength.

Confront rebellion calmly and deliver consequences, rather than words.